Two guys were discussing life in general over drinks one night.
“My grandfather lived to be 96.”
“Ninety-six? What finally got him?”
“Liquor and women.”
“Well, that just goes to show ya,” snickered the one guy, “both will get you in the end.”
“Well actually, no, it’s not what ya think. Towards the end, Grandpa couldn’t get either, so he just laid down and died.”
A man who drank alot was told by his wife “If you ever come home drunk again, I’m going to leave you”. Regardless, that night he went…
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A blind man went to a restaurant. “Menu sir?” asked the owner. “I’m blind, just bring me one of your dirty forks. I will smell it and…